Brief Thoughts on a Manic Monday #2

ITEM: The Imaginary Girlfriend has sent me a parcel to open on my birthday. A time ago she said she’d send me Fifty Shades of Grey, but it’s rather a large parcel for the one book, so there’s a possibility she’s sent the whole trilogy and will expect me to read them all.

I wonder if they do Cliff Notes.

In conversation Saturday night she said that what had intrigued her about the book was the relationship and the mystery of how Christian Grey got to be how he is.

Just my sodding luck, that she’d be the one woman who isn’t reading it for all the kinky sex.

ITEM: I really wish that the headline writers for internet news feeds would give more thought to how their copy might get cut off when it appears on the screen. Case in point:-

‘Pink tops herself yet again’

Of course there’s always the possibility that somebody puts quite a lot of thought into stuff like that, in which case…


ITEM: Staying with the theme, running order is important too. Last week on yahoo ‘Woman fights wolf with bare hands’ was immediately followed by ‘Muslim cleric wins’.

ITEM: And, of course, the most careful copy writer of all, can still see his work fall prey to simple human misunderstanding, as happened a short while ago when a friend of mine asked if I’d read the newspaper headline about Jimmy Saville being a suspect in the Jack the Ripper investigation.

I always knew he was older than he looked, but still…

ITEM: Nationwide recently offered me the chance to enter a competition in which the prize was ‘a tour of Coronation Street in the New Year’.

Targeted advertising really, really doesn’t work that well, I’m thinking.

ITEM: I got seriously conflicted last week when the time came to vote in the Police Commissioner elections. Having vowed to ignore the quisling LibDems I was disconcerted to discover that their candidate was a ‘James Joyce’. I went with my principles and voted for the Independent, but all the same I felt like I’d let down my literary heritage.

ITEM: Another reason to hate the Tories:-

If Dave seriously wants to clean the country up, he should leave and take all his comrades with him.

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