Thoughts on a Wednesday #6

ITEM: Amazingly, or not, we haven’t had Thoughts on a Wednesday since back in October of last year. Apparently my brain likes to take a mid-week nap.

ITEM: Occasionally I get anxiety attacks – as yesterday, when I purchased the DVD of Red Cliff at Poundland, and then later in day had to take it out of my bag just to reassure myself that it was a four and a half hour film directed by John Woo and based on a famous battle in Chinese history, and not a concert performed at the Kremlin pre-glasnost by The Shadows’ backing singer.

ITEM: While travelling home on the bus it occurred to me that the modern landscape in Britain is dominated by porta-loos, and that if they’d launched Doctor Who in the noughties the TARDIS probably wouldn’t be a police phone box.

ITEM: The other day I received a letter that had a return address of ‘Unit 1 Enigma Building, Bilton Road, Bletchely’, and for a minute or so was quite convinced that the UK’s security services wished to recruit me for their code breaking activities, only to then to discover that it was junk mail from a firm who want to send me free wine.

ITEM: Amazon seems to think that I might be interested in buying Robo-Geisha. Have to admit that I blanched on reading the product description – ‘the girls are subjected to an alarming range of bionic surgical enhancements including machine-gun breasts, slasher socks, butt swords and napalm wigs’…

Butt swords?

Oh dear, Japan, what are you doing to your young women?

ITEM: As somebody who was formerly part of the editorial team at a science fiction magazine naturally I am opposed to technological change of any sort, so upset today to find myself Skyped against my will.

In practical terms it doesn’t really matter, as I never used Messenger and probably won’t use Skype, but all the same the noise it makes when I turn the computer on/off is annoying and I already miss those little boxes that pop up when you get a new email.

There’s probably a way to customise the Skype experience to get both these things sorted, but at the moment I don’t have time to investigate that and am having far too much fun feeling hard done by.

ITEM: For many of us in the UK tomorrow is a chance to vote in council elections. I myself shall be supporting the Green candidate if we have one, as they’re the only party with whom I’m not as yet thoroughly disillusioned, and if there isn’t a Green then I guess I’ll go with Labour as the best of a bad lot. I believe I have before characterised voting in an election as looking into an unflushed toilet pan and having to choose the least smelly turd, and as I grow older and see more of politics I become increasingly confirmed in that opinion.

But the overriding concern at the present moment is this – that the posh boys and the LibDem quislings who support them all get a bloody good kicking.

Sadly where I live if the Tories put up a bale of straw as a candidate it would be elected, so I’m depending on the rest of you to make my Friday morning a happy one.

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